I don’t know how you found this space, maybe through a late-night scroll after the house was finally quiet, or maybe a friend shared it with you (that’s a good friend to hold onto). Maybe you found this page during a quiet nap time or after another night of broken sleep. However you got here, I want you to know right away: you are not alone.
I’m a mom, just like you. Some days I feel strong and ready to handle what the day throws my way, but most other days… well let’s just say it’s a struggle. I’ve known the smiles and sweetness, but also the utter depletion. The moments where joy felt like something everyone else had figured out, while I was running on autopilot, wondering if I’d ever feel like myself again.
Motherhood, I’ve learned, is messier than most people are willing to admit.
There’s no shortage of content celebrating motherhood; the pride in our children’s achievements, the heart-swelling joy of holding them close. And yes, those moments are real. But so are the moments when you’re touched out, sleep-deprived, emotionally frayed, and quietly wondering, Is it okay that I’m not enjoying this right now?
I’ve had seasons where I felt like a vending machine…always giving, rarely receiving. So much of my day was lived on autopilot, and when I wanted to be honest, I didn’t always have the space or the safety to say it out loud. Even with those I trusted, I held back. I felt guilty for the frustration, ashamed of my numbness, afraid that naming it out loud would somehow mean I was failing as a mom. So, I put on the mask and gave everyone the “I’m fine” line. I now know “I’m fine” is code for “I’m functioning, not flourishing.
I didn’t always know if I was doing the right thing, sometimes I knew I wasn’t. But one of my closest and dearest of friends gave me a nugget of wisdom that stuck with me and has gotten me through many tough seasons. She would always say “We may not always make the right choices, but with God’s help, we can try to make the wrong choices right.” At some of the hardest point in my life I didn’t know if joy would ever return. Would I ever feel peace in motherhood?
The spoiler? Yes (mostly).
I still get overwhelmed. I still hit moments where I feel like I’m at the edge of what I can carry. I still make choices I need to correct. As my kids grow and life keeps shifting, I constantly have to re-learn things I thought I had mastered. But here’s what I know now: God’s grace has carried me this far, and He’s not letting go. Not now. Not ever. How do I know this you ask, well there is 2 Corinthians 12:9 and He has proven it to be true to me over and over.
Bringing my whole, honest, unfiltered self to the altar (mess and all) has been the very thing that unlocked the revelations I needed. If I had held back, I would have missed out on the fullness of the blessing God intended for me. God didn’t require my perfection, He asked for my presence.
I started this blog because I believe that we were made for fellowship, we were not meant to do life alone. Sharing how God has worked in my stories may remind others of God’s truth, even when life feels too heavy for them to see it. I don’t carry any fancy credentials or polished answers. What I do have is a heart that has been stretched by life but held together by faith.
My heart for this space:
-Honesty over perfection: I believe in sharing the real, not the filtered.
-Faith in every season: Whether we’re in a season of peace or in the thick of survival mode, God is with us.
-Connection over comparison: You won’t find mom guilt here, only grace.
-Mental and emotional health matter: We can love Jesus and need counseling.
If you’ve ever felt like you’re the only one struggling to find joy, you’re not. If you’ve ever wondered if other moms feel stretched, ashamed, or just plain tired, we do. And if you’ve ever felt like motherhood was breaking you… know that even there, God is near. He doesn’t love some future version of you. He loves you in this moment, sleep-deprived and worn out.
That is all for now,
Jenn